// i don’t know about you, but i’m feeling twenty (too) //

(…that’s how the song goes, right? xD)


As of today, I’ve officially moved from “I’m only 19 but my mind is older!” (Hamilton) to “At 20 years of age, I’m still looking for a dream…” (Francesca Battistelli).

It’s a weird feeling– knowing that I’m in an entirely new decade of life now. I’m not altogether certain I’m old enough to be in my 20’s yet. xD But, well, here I am, beginning a new adventure, and I think I’m ready for it.

Nineteen wasn’t as dramatically life-changing a year as eighteen was (it’s hard to top voted/graduated high school/started college in a different state/moved houses, right?), but it was still very much a year full of life, laughter, newness, and growth.

Nineteen was Lindsey Stirling, Mindy Gledhill, Relient K, Celtic music, and movie soundtracks played on repeat.

Nineteen was reading The Lunar Chronicles and the Harry Potter series, and falling in love with both stories (despite the fact that I technically haven’t finished Harry Potter yet, ahem).

Nineteen was making new friends (#adventuresquad– love you guys) and growing closer to old and dear ones (Liberty family, online kindreds, and home-friends– love y’all too).

Nineteen was Wonder Woman, The Great British Baking Show, This Is Us, and watching the finales of Friends and The Office for the third or fourth time (…and then starting the pilot of The Office again, oops).

Nineteen was Disney adventures with Mom, beach adventures with family and one of my dearest friends, and Liberty adventures with my college family.

Nineteen was learning all over again that I must be brave and take action (admittedly, it’s a struggle that I haven’t overcome just yet, but maybe twenty-Em will).

Nineteen was this ever-present tug on my heart to do more, to be more– to “live a life, not just play a part”– to do something that has kingdom-worth and impact here, instead of going through the motions of schoolwork (again, admittedly, I’m not where I want to be, but God is calling me to act, somehow, and I will follow where He leads).

Nineteen was the motivation to live and eat healthier– and the grace to accept that I will fail in this endeavor when relying on my own strength.

Nineteen was the Psalms, theology, and falling more and more in love with my Savior.

Nineteen was sunshine, flowers, rose golds and deep purples and sunny yellows, lovely letters from far-away friends, and Jesus-joy woven into every day (no matter how stressed or saddened I was).

Nineteen was a beautiful year, and I am so grateful that the Lord has carried me through my teenage years to where I am today, and for everyone who has been part of my story so far (be it only in this chapter [so far], or throughout the whole thing).

Hello, dear twenty. Let’s begin this new adventure, yeah?


‘Cause I got the wind in my hair and a dream in my eyes and an endless horizon
I got a smile on my face and I’m walking on air
Everything life ought to be
It’s all gonna happen to me out there
And I’ll find it, I swear
With the wind in my hair

And I got the wind in my hair and a song in my heart and the fun’s only started
I got a skip in my step and I haven’t a care
Colorful breeze blowing through
It’s gonna carry me who knows where
And I’ll take any dare
With the wind in my hair

(Mandy Moore, “Wind In My Hair”, from Tangled: Before Ever After)